Sexless in the City

audio title

Sexless in the City

A Sometimes Sassy, Sometimes Painful, Always Honest Look at Dating, Desire, and Sex

Kat Harris


  • Description
  • Author
  • Info
  • Reviews


Discover a renewed biblical vision for sex, singleness, and relationships, and transform into an empowered woman of faith equipped to navigate today's dating culture with vision, clarity, and freedom. 

Let's face it: being single in today's culture as a woman of faith can be a STRUGGLE FEST. But it doesn't have to be. With real talk and straight wisdom, speaker, podcaster, and founder of The Refined Woman Kat Harris says it's time for a new conversation about singleness, sex, and desire. 

Growing up at the height of the purity movement, Kat knew this much: good Christians don't have sex until marriage. But approaching 30 and thrust into the New York City dating scene, she found a set of rules was not a compelling enough reason to keep her clothes on. Caught between purity culture's rules and popular culture's do what feels good, Kat began a multi-year journey searching for answers to the biggest questions about sexuality and faith:

  • What does the Bible really say about sex?
  • Why does almost everyone deal with some sort of sexual shame?
  • But really--what's a single girl to do with her sexual desire? 
  • What if we never get married . . . then what? 

It turns out Kat was asking questions that countless women were dying to ask but didn't know they had the permission to do so. Hungry for clarity, she researched, wrestled, and discovered a God who wasn't afraid or ashamed of sex and desire as she thought He might be. In actuality, God created sex and desire within humanity and called it very good. Now she believes God desires to restore a generation disillusioned with purity culture and Christian dating, discouraged about their singleness, ashamed of their sexual desire, and uncertain how to practically walk this season out well. 

Join Kat on her messy, sometimes painful, and always honest journey to discovering God's heart for sexuality, desire, singleness, and our purpose within it all.

Discussion questions and accompanying table are available in the audiobook companion PDF download.


Kat Harris:

Kat Harris currently lives in Brooklyn, New York. From Bible major to editorial photographer to educator to host of The Refined Collective Podcast, and now author, she’s never shied away from doing things her way. Through her online platform, The Refined Woman, her vision is to be a voice of truth and hope while equipping women to walk in wholeness, worthiness, and freedom. She fiercely loves her big Texas family, and is indebted to her faithful community scattered all over the world. She believes in the power of story, and that every opportunity is an opportunity for growth if we choose it to be.